Taking The Fun Out Of Funeral

"I read that the number one fear of the average person is public speaking... Number two was death. o me, that means that, to the average person, if you were going to be at a funeral, you would rather be in the casket than doing the eulogy." - Jerry Seinfeld

Seinfeld's 3 Rules For Living

"My three rules for living: First, bust your ass... Second, pay attention. Learn from everything and everyone... My third rule: Fall in love. Fall in love with your street, your tennis game... Someone could say "I love this fork," and I'd think that was great." - Jerry Seinfeld

Wise words! Love drives happiness.

Judge Clears Way For Additional Wrigley Renovations

CHICAGO -- The Chicago Cubs don't have to halt construction on a Wrigley Field video board that will block game views of adjacent rooftop clubs, a federal judge ruled on Thursday, dismissing claims from the one-of-a-kind businesses that they're doomed if it goes up.

The ruling means both that the right-field sign could be operational soon and that the Cubs' $375 million renovation of the century-old ballpark -- which the teams sees as central to its future success -- remains on track.

Skybox on Sheffield and Lakeview Baseball Club requested the preliminary injunction until a wide-ranging lawsuit is resolved. The rooftop owners say a 2004 revenue-sharing agreement with the Cubs prevents the team from obstructing views. They hoped the judge would issue an order in their favor before the Cubs' first home game, this Sunday.

But in a 35-page opinion laden with baseball puns, U.S. District Judge Virginia Kendall wrote that the rooftops "have cried foul" but haven't demonstrated their businesses would, in fact, go under for good if the Cubs weren't stopped immediately from erecting the video board.

She didn't accept the obstruction would kill their businesses, noting how Cubs games themselves are often secondary to the party atmosphere on the urban rooftops in the Wrigleyville neighborhood.

"One might argue ... that the patrons who go to the Rooftops do not really go to watch the game at all, and when they do, they see very little of it anyway," she wrote. "Being in close vicinity to the game with fresh air, alcohol, and good food might be sufficient to run a business -- maybe not the business they are in now- but certainly a business."

The judge noted that the revenue-sharing deal between the Cubs and the rooftop owners includes a clause allowing for an "expansion" of Wrigley Field, provided it was approved by a governmental authority.

The Ricketts family, whose scion founded the online brokerage Ameritrade, has been sparring with rooftop owners since buying the Cubs in 2009. The Cubs say the signs and other stadium upgrades will help them field better teams -- ones that could vie for the Cubs' first World Series in more than a century.

The ongoing renovations also include a left-field Jumbotron and a half-dozen other signs. Other rooftop properties that did not push for a preliminary injunction on the video board are parties to other civil action.

In a statement late Thursday, the Cubs expressed gratitude for the judge's decision.

"We look forward to moving ahead with the expansion to protect and preserve Wrigley Field for our fans and our team," the Cubs said.

In oral arguments over the preliminary injunction last week, one attorney for the rooftop owners, Thomas Lombardo, accused the Cubs of violating antitrust law, saying the team sought to manipulate ticket prices and to "bully" rooftop properties into selling out to the Cubs. He said the Cubs bought at least some stake in four of 16 rooftops and then altered plans to position signs in front of rooftops they don't own.

But Cubs attorney Daniel Laytin said that misrepresents the relationship of the team to the rooftops. It is not one of competitor to competitor, he said, but of producer to distributor -- the Cubs being the producers of baseball games and the rooftops selling views of games. Antitrust laws don't apply in that kind of relationship, he said.

Kendall on Thursday also rejected the rooftops' claim of an antitrust violation, including by pointing to a U.S. Supreme Court decision exempting major league baseball from antitrust laws.

Ten Exercises That Burn More Calories Than Running

We’re huge fans of running. It allows you to get a stress-reducing, endurance-boosting workout with just a pair of shoes and an open road.

It also burns calories, of course. At a 10-minute per mile pace—roughly the average guy’s marathon pace—you’ll fry about 10 calories a minute.

That’s a solid number, and if you run faster, you can burn even more.

But if running isn’t your favorite activity, there are plenty of other modes of exercise that can help you torch calories at a lightning fast rate.

“In general, you burn more calories by doing high-intensity weight training than you do running,” says Harold Gibbons, a trainer at Mark Fisher Fitness in New York City, and the New York State Director of the National Strength and Conditioning Association.

Most people don’t realize this, though. That’s often because the number of calories you’re told you just burned is typically estimated from The Compendium of Physical Activities, which calculates energy expended through aerobic metabolism. That works well for low- to medium-intensity exercise, but not so well for higher-intensity activities that rely on anaerobic metabolism.

In fact, when researchers at the University of Southern Maine used a more advanced method to estimate energy expenditure during exercise, they found that weight training burns up to 71 percent more calories than originally thought. Which suggests that a fast-paced circuit workout burns as many calories as running at a 6-minute per mile pace.

But resistance training isn’t your only option. There are also cardio exercises that can boost your burn, too. We found 10 exercises that will help you incinerate calories—without ever having to hit pavement.

Kettlebell Swing
This explosive exercise works the big, powerful muscles around your glutes and quads, and sends your heart into overdrive, according to research from the University of Wisconsin.

In the study, participants burned 20.2 calories a minute and their average heart was 93 percent of its max for the course of a 20-minute workout.

“The kettlebell swing works you so hard because it’s not a movement you’re used to,” says Dan John, a strength coach in Salt Lake City and the author ofIntervention. “You’re not super efficient at it, which taxes your body.”

Indoor Rowing
A 185-pound guy can burn 377 calories during 30 minutes of vigorous rowing, or about 12.5 calorie per minute, reports a Harvard University study.

And because you need to utilize the muscles in your arms, legs, and back for efficient strokes, it’s a great total-body trainer.

Burpees
A 180-pound person burns about 1.43 calories per burpee, says exercise scientist and Spartan Coach Jeff Godin. So if you can hammer out at least seven a minute you’re in the double digits.

But you should shoot to average at least 10 every 60 seconds, or a rate of 14.3 calories per minute. Why? Performing just 10 reps at a fast pace can rev your metabolism as much as a 30-second, all-out bike sprint, according to a study presented at the American College of Sports Medicine annual meeting.

(Photo: Thinkstock)

AirDyne Bike Sprints
It sounds downright crazy, but Gym Jones manager Rob MacDonald proved that it’s possible to blast 87 calories in one minute on this stationary bike that increases its resistance as you pedal harder. The key: Give everything you have in that 60 seconds.

Note: This was by no means a scientific experiment, and relies on the accuracy of the built-in AirDyne monitor, which calculates calories by converting revolutions of the fan into physical work.

Jumping Rope
Moderate-intensity rope jumping—about 100 to 120 skips per minute—burns about 13 calories a minute, according to the Compendium of Physical Activities.

This mode of exercise uses more muscle groups than jogging, and challenges your balance, and coordination—especially if you practice drills that require extra hand and foot skills. 

(Photo: Thinkstock)

Fat-Tire Biking
If you haven’t tried this fast-growing cycling sport, you should. You can burn up to 1,500 calories an hour—or nearly 25 calories per minute—pedaling the heavy, hard-to-turn monster bikes and tackling all types of terrain, all year round, says Mike Curiak, record holder for the 1,000-mile Iditasport Impossible, a fat tire biking race.

Reality check: That kind of calorie burn depends on your fitness and strength levels, and your skill. But regardless, it’s sure to be one hell of workout.

“Cindy”
This CrossFit Workout of the Day (WOD) burns an average 13 calories per minute, according to scientists at Kennesaw State University.

It’s effective because it pairs three exercises—5 pullups, 10 pushups, and 15 air squats— that work different major muscle groups, and you do as many rounds as possible in 20 minutes.

So if you’re in amazing condition, you can go all-out for each one, without slowing down or stopping to recover in between.

If you’re somewhat less than amazing (read: like most people), you simply rest when needed. For example, you don’t move on to the pushup until you’ve completed 5 reps of the pullup, even if you have to stop and start.

“Any routine that takes you from standing, down to the ground, and back up to standing again is an amazing calorie burner, because it really spikes the heart rate,” says John. And for the fuel your body needs to exercise hard—and recover faster—check out these 20 Healthy Smoothie Recipes.

Cross-Country Skiing
Zipping along on skis delivers a better heart-pounding workout compared to running at about the same pace, thanks to the fact that the sport requires you to push with your lower-body and pull with your upper.

In fact, a good cross-country ski session can burn more than 12 calories a minute, according to the Compendium of Physical Activities.

That explains why Nordic Skiers consistently collapse in exhaustion at the finish line of Olympic races. (No fresh snow? Look for the new Concept2 SkiErg machine at your gym.)

Tabata Jump Squats
This four-minute miracle drill burns major calories both during a workout and after. In an Auburn University at Montgomery study, participants who did eight rounds of all-out jump squats—20 seconds of hard work, separated by 10 seconds of rest—burned 13.4 calories per minute and doubled their post-exercise metabolic rate for at least 30 minutes. To try it yourself, check out The Unbelievable 4-Minute Cardio Workout.

(Photo: Thinkstock) 

Battling Ropes
In a recent College of New Jersey study comparing various workout styles, battling-rope exercises came in first in terms of total oxygen consumption and an average calorie burn of 10.3 calories per minute.

And for a complete cutting-edge exercise and nutrition guide that youcan use on your computer, tablet, or phone, check out The Lose Your Spare Tire Program. It’s the easiest and mosteffective way to drop 20, 30, or even 50 pounds (and flatten your belly forever!).

Holy Cow: Wrigley Field Has A Jumbotron Now

Wrigley Field is undergoing some major changes this offseason. The second oldest ballpark in the majors has experienced some structural issues in recent years, and now was the time for the Chicago Cubs to finally bring the park into the 21st century.

Fans got their first look at what that means Wednesday.

Holy moly! That's a Jumbotron at Wrigley Field! For the first time in the park's history, fans will be able to watch video replays, as well as other video displays, during games. That's exciting and significant.

Overall, though, construction has not gone as smoothly. Concerns over whether the bleachers would be ready for the regular season started back in November. After a combination of cold temperatures, snow and strong winds put the construction team behind schedule, the club admitted in January that the bleachers would not be completed by opening day. 

The left field bleachers could be completed by May, according to the Chicago Sun Times. The right field bleachers likely won't be finished until June. The team is considering covering the unfinished bleachers with a tribute to Ernie Banks, who died during the offseason. Those plans have not been finalized yet. 

The issues with construction extend past this season. Team chairman Tom Ricketts recently announced that the entire project will likely take an extra year to complete. The entire renovation was initially expected to be finished by the start of the 2018 season. Now, it appears 2019 is the more likely target, according to the Sun Times. 

“There will be four more years,” Ricketts said Wednesday after speaking at a City Club of Chicago luncheon. “The way we project it now is four more years of construction.”

Dennis Culloton, a spokesman for Ricketts, confirmed Wednesday evening that the project could very well bleed into a fifth offseason, one more than the original plan.

“That could still be the way it works out,” Culloton said of the original four-phase plan. “But it could take longer. Just take this winter for example, and we have found not only the problem with the weather but the water pipes that we had no control over. It could be four years, it could be five. It’s hard to say.”

The Cubs are currently in the middle of the first of four offseason phases of construction. The bleachers were a major part of phase one. Phase two will include a new home clubhouse, bullpens and an outdoor plaza.

The third phase will include renovations to the visitors clubhouse, as well as a new umpires' room and improvements to the luxury suites. The final phase will focus on the press box and a new hotel. 

Those improvements were set to be completed each offseason, leading the team to initially project a four-year plan for the entire project. With construction already behind, it's easy to see why Ricketts is concerned the project could extend into a fifth year. 

With that said, the Cubs will still open the season Sunday at home against the St. Louis Cardinals. While some fans will be without seats, at least the new video board will be operational for opening night. 

Things went pretty well for the team off the field this offseason, it's the state of the actual field that has fans concerned now. 

Simple Solution To The Tanking Problem

By Cork Gaines, Business Insider:

"Tanking" — the process of creating a team that is designed to lose a lot of games with the hopes of gaining a valuable draft pick — reared its ugly head again when Buffalo Sabres fans cheered a game-winning goal by the opposing team.

When he was a Ph.D. candidate in statistics at the University of Missouri in 2012, Adam Gold presented a solution to tanking at the MIT Sloan Sports Analytics Conference.

Gold's "Reverse Standings" method attempts to reward the teams that need draft picks the most while at the same time discouraging teams from intentionally losing games.

The proposal is rather brilliant in its simplicity, something that will appeal to most sports fans, and is better than the system currently in place for most major sports.

Here is how the "Reverse Standings" method would work:

Teams that do not make the playoffs are ranked based on the number of games they win (or points they accumulate in the NHL) after they are eliminated from playoff contention. The team with the most wins (or points) is then given the top pick in the draft. The team with second-most wins (or points) receives the second pick and so on.

The important point here is that only games played after being eliminated from playoff contention are used to determine the draft order.

In theory, the worst teams are eliminated earlier in the season and those teams have the most chances to accumulate wins or points. For example, an NBA team eliminated from playoff contention with 30 games to go will have 30 chances to rack up wins and will have a much better chance to get the top pick than a team eliminated with one week to go.

What this system would cure is the systematic losing that takes place once teams know they are no longer a playoff contender. Gold showed that the winning percentages for teams in all four major North American sports leagues decline after they are eliminated from the playoffs, with the difference being quite dramatic in the NBA and NHL.

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(Adam Gold, University of Missouri)

Instead of a system that has teams losing games to jockey for draft position or ping pong balls in a lottery, teams will actually be rewarded for winning games, creating a scenario where all teams will want to win games down the stretch.

Gold used the 2010 NHL draft as an example and posted the number of points each team acquired after they were eliminated from playoff contention. While the Edmonton Oilers were the first team eliminated and easily would have "won" the first pick overall, there were nine teams with 3-6 points where one win in the final week could have been the difference between picking third or 11th.

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(Adam Gold)

Of course, like any potential solution, this has some problems. There are two big ones.

1. It won't eliminate tanking completely.

Instead of tanking at the end of the season, teams would now tank early in the season.

Teams that have decided before the season that they are going to tank are not going to stop tanking games. Under this system, they will just race faster to get eliminated from playoff contention so that they can start picking up wins and points for the draft.

The counter-argument to this is that tanking for the first half of the season is better than tanking all season. So there is still a net improvement.

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(Getty Images)The Sabres have been accused of lying down on the ice.

2. Players don't tank, front offices do.

The problem with using a tanking plan, even under the current lottery systems, is that the players themselves have no incentive to tank. Unlike front offices, players aren't motivated to improve a team's draft position. In fact, they have an incentive to win and try to avoid acquiring a younger player that could take their job.

So while a front office may put an inferior product on the court, those lesser players are still currently playing to win games. It's not like Gold's plan is going to suddenly make players more motivated to win games. In fact, they might have less motivation because getting a higher draft pick hurts their job security. In other words, it's hard to see players saying, "Let's win this game for the first pick!"

The counter-argument here is that both scenarios are bad and the other benefits of Gold's plan outweigh this flaw.

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(AP)

In the end, Gold's proposal is not perfect. In all likelihood there will never be a perfect solution. Tanking is probably a problem that is here to stay.

But the Reverse Standings method does add some interesting wrinkles to what is currently a broken system and would add meaning to games that currently don't have much.

Love Sneaks In: McDonalds, Haucks Marry Privately

"Breaking up is hard to do." - Neil Sedaka

After two months of consideration, Joe and Dena McDonald wed Ben and Rosie Hauck in a private ceremony at the county office early Wednesday morning.

The couples, married for over 30 combined years, saw additional benefits of extending their union.

"The topic came up early in the rehearsals of Dirty Rotten Scoundrels," Ben explained about a dinner shortly after Joe and Rosie were cast as romantic leads Andre Thibault and Muriel Eubanks in the musical.

"Malea and Josie had been asking for more time with us. We can't be everywhere at once, so why not just add a couple more parents to cover the bases?"

The McDonalds, who own a kitten but have no children of their own, bring decades of uncle-aunt experience and popularity into the Hauck home.

"Ben and I both being artistic, it just gave me a more natural outlet for that type of conversation," Dena added. "Joe and Rosie can discuss left-brained stuff whenever they need it."

"The tax forms will be complicated, but in the end we felt that the pros outweighed the cons," said Joe, a former tax department employee at State Farm.

"The four of us are all big believers in personal health," noted Rosie, a fitness coach. "So we plan to live a long time. No one wants to be lonely, so it makes sense to have as big a family as possible."

Alan Wilson presided over the intimate ceremony, with Allen Popowski providing music.

"I couldn't be happier," Wilson reflected afterward. "Theater families are the best kind."