"I have never had a feeling politically that did not spring from the sentiments embodied in the Declaration of Independence." - Lincoln
If our actions are consistent with some set of values - in Lincoln's case the Declaration - then we feel solid about ourselves, even when others are against us.
Monday, April 7, 2014
The First Step To Winning Relationships
"If you would win a man to your cause, first convince him that you are his sincere friend." - Lincoln
As a supervisor I used to say that it doesn't matter if you care for me, only that I care for you. It works in every room, with every person, in every type of relationship though. Trust comes from how much I care about you, and how little I care about me, screamed loudly through my actions and barely whispered in words.
As a supervisor I used to say that it doesn't matter if you care for me, only that I care for you. It works in every room, with every person, in every type of relationship though. Trust comes from how much I care about you, and how little I care about me, screamed loudly through my actions and barely whispered in words.
Strength In Numbers
"With public sentiment, nothing can fail; without it, nothing can succeed. Consequently he who molds public sentiment goes deeper than he who enacts statutes or pronounces decisions." - Lincoln
Leaders become leaders, almost by definition, on the strength of those willing to follow them. Anything else is a dictator, and not nearly as effectively. We lead as well as we are freely giving of our energy, commitment, and compassion for others above self.
Leaders become leaders, almost by definition, on the strength of those willing to follow them. Anything else is a dictator, and not nearly as effectively. We lead as well as we are freely giving of our energy, commitment, and compassion for others above self.
Sunday, April 6, 2014
Saturday, April 5, 2014
Ten Reasons We've Lasted 16 Years
Dena and I took advantage of a $50 Avanti's gift certificate from the basketball team tonight to kick off a wonderful date night including movie and ice cream.
Part of our dinner conversation in this anniversary month or ours was to come up with reasons why our marriage works so well for us. These reasons wouldn't work for everyone, but they've contributed to 16 years of our happiness and counting.
1. We are both "pleasers" at heart who disdain conflict and hurting others' feelings.
2. Our natural response to being challenged is to quietly absorb and reflect, rather than to respond rashly.
3. We like to be busy, which gives us enough variety that we don't "tire" of each other. It also keeps our own self-image strong.
4. We stay in reasonably good health.
5. We are financially conservative. It's not that we shut the lights off whenever we leave the room, shop at the cheapest places in town, or aggressively coupon our purchases. But we are savers, and our home and wardrobes are modest, and we buy unflashy high-quality things.
6. We believe in God.
7. We say thank you and I'm sorry a lot.
8. We like to laugh and be silly, but not at others' expense, and especially not at each others' expense. In general, we try not to be complainers.
9. We are not worriers, and we get better at this every year. Part faith, part experience. We may do things that the other wouldn't do, but we are supportive, sometimes by simply saying nothing at all. We don't nag.
10. We hug, kiss, and dote on each other daily.
Part of our dinner conversation in this anniversary month or ours was to come up with reasons why our marriage works so well for us. These reasons wouldn't work for everyone, but they've contributed to 16 years of our happiness and counting.
1. We are both "pleasers" at heart who disdain conflict and hurting others' feelings.
2. Our natural response to being challenged is to quietly absorb and reflect, rather than to respond rashly.
3. We like to be busy, which gives us enough variety that we don't "tire" of each other. It also keeps our own self-image strong.
4. We stay in reasonably good health.
5. We are financially conservative. It's not that we shut the lights off whenever we leave the room, shop at the cheapest places in town, or aggressively coupon our purchases. But we are savers, and our home and wardrobes are modest, and we buy unflashy high-quality things.
6. We believe in God.
7. We say thank you and I'm sorry a lot.
8. We like to laugh and be silly, but not at others' expense, and especially not at each others' expense. In general, we try not to be complainers.
9. We are not worriers, and we get better at this every year. Part faith, part experience. We may do things that the other wouldn't do, but we are supportive, sometimes by simply saying nothing at all. We don't nag.
10. We hug, kiss, and dote on each other daily.
Movie Review: God's Not Dead
I'd heard some good things about this one, one of a string of Christian movies in the last five years that brings a smile to kind hearts. Despite a rash of painful moments, Dena and I enjoyed it too.
A college freshman takes a stand against an atheist philosophy professor (Kevin Sorbo), who challenges him to prove God exists or else fail that part of the course. He accepts the challenge, jeopardizing his pre-law career and his girlfriend.
Meanwhile, the college professor treats his Christian girlfriend like trash, jeopardizing their relationship.
Meanwhile, a Muslim student secretly hides her Christian faith, jeopardizing her home life.
Meanwhile, a Chinese exchange student starts considering a Christian conversion, jeopardizing his family life.
Meanwhile, an uppity reporter learns that she has cancer, jeopardizing her life.
Meanwhile, a cocky businessman disses his dementia-ridden mother.
Meanwhile, a local pastor questions his ability to succeed "in the trenches," jeopardizing his ministry.
Oh, and there's a Duck Dynasty guy and a spate of references to the Newsboys rock group.
To put it mildly, there's a lot going on, which keeps things snapping along.
Whether you do or don't believe in God, you'll probably walk away believing the same unless you're easily swept away by roundabout logic and fancy charts. But there are literally a couple of "come to Jesus" moments at the end sure to bring tears to the eyes of anyone who either believes in such moments, or who cried at the end of Dead Poets' Society.
Find a comfy theater chair and some friends who share your beliefs, and give this one a try.
A college freshman takes a stand against an atheist philosophy professor (Kevin Sorbo), who challenges him to prove God exists or else fail that part of the course. He accepts the challenge, jeopardizing his pre-law career and his girlfriend.
Meanwhile, the college professor treats his Christian girlfriend like trash, jeopardizing their relationship.
Meanwhile, a Muslim student secretly hides her Christian faith, jeopardizing her home life.
Meanwhile, a Chinese exchange student starts considering a Christian conversion, jeopardizing his family life.
Meanwhile, an uppity reporter learns that she has cancer, jeopardizing her life.
Meanwhile, a cocky businessman disses his dementia-ridden mother.
Meanwhile, a local pastor questions his ability to succeed "in the trenches," jeopardizing his ministry.
Oh, and there's a Duck Dynasty guy and a spate of references to the Newsboys rock group.
To put it mildly, there's a lot going on, which keeps things snapping along.
Whether you do or don't believe in God, you'll probably walk away believing the same unless you're easily swept away by roundabout logic and fancy charts. But there are literally a couple of "come to Jesus" moments at the end sure to bring tears to the eyes of anyone who either believes in such moments, or who cried at the end of Dead Poets' Society.
Find a comfy theater chair and some friends who share your beliefs, and give this one a try.
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