Captain Assertive!

I have not been exposed to any radioactive blasts, struck by lightning, or bitten by a mysterious spider. To my knowledge.

And yet, somehow I unleashed a new superpower today.

During the week I'm a mild-mannered actuary, tutor, husband and coach.

Today I was visiting a new quickie oil change store. Both bays had cars in them. I parked about twenty yards away, waiting for one to clear. I figured I'd give it 15 minutes. That turned out to be right.

As I put down my magazine and started to pull forward, and SUV pulled past me and into the bay.

A strange sensation swept through my veins. I leaped out of my car with jaw-dropping speed.
Captain Assertive to the rescue!

I marched into the bay on the heels of the SUV, and right up to the employee who was ushering the it in.

"Can I help you?"

"Yeah, I've been waiting there for 20 minutes, and now this gentleman's just pulled past me and into the bay. Is that right?"

Defender of the truth!

It turned out that I'd been far enough away that I hadn't tripped the cable-bell, so he thought I was waiting for someone outside a nearby store. Captain Assertive chose not to suggest that the cable be moved farther back, so that the driver is left with enough room to go to whichever bay opened up first.

"I'm sorry for causing any trouble," the superhero said.

"You didn't cause any trouble," the employee remarked.

"Hey, it's no problem," said SUV driver.

"Would you still like to come in?" asked the employee.

Captain Assertive, the Man of Forthrighteousness, struck a commanding pose.

"Yes, I would."

The shop manager took my information and the work was done within 15 minutes. Meanwhile, I had returned to my mild-mannered (and yes, on this lazy Saturday afternoon, bespectacled) state, quietly reading Sports Illustrated for inspirational coaching phrases in the waiting room.

The employee entered, apologizing again. I did the same. Ready to serve my country with all the new-found confidence of a dynamic alter ego.

[Hidden Blog note: Coach Short, I guess your advice about saying more stuff had a more powerful effect than either of us could have imagined!]