I finished my first shift tutoring at Heartland Community College this afternoon.
As I walked out of the library, I noticed an unlit room. More accurately, I noticed the hand-lettered sign that was yarn-hung outside of it:
"Lactation Room."
I didn't peek in.
I swear.
As far as I know, nothing was going on in there.
There were no rows upon rows of new and existing mothers hooked up to greedy vacuum tubes. Or worse, being harvested by experienced farm hands (we ain't the heartland of agriculture for nothin', folks).
I think this is how the speed-walking fitness craze was born. I really do. A wise housewife caught sight of her glaze-eyed male ignoramus husband streaking down a hallway from the unspeakable horror of the breast-milking room, realized it had the benefits of aerobics without the thigh-shaming curse of spandex, and the rest is history.
By the time I regained rational thought, I had a large welt on my head. Somewhere on the Heartland campus near the library there is likely a light pole with a man-sized-forehead-shaped dent. Or fifty.
1 comment:
Hahaha! Thanks for the laugh!!
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