Making Change

Courtesy of Lisa:

"We cannot change anything until we accept it. Condemnation does not liberate, it oppresses." - Carl Jung

How well do we accept ourselves? Are we trying to be something we're not? Do we condemn ourselves for it, or hold ourselves back by dwelling on our own limitations?

Whether it's directed internally or externally, condemnation begets itself. Fortunately, so too does praise.

I had a tense confrontation with a co-worker once upon a time. The days that followed still required us to work closely together, and were unpleasant. I had apologized immediately, and received no apology in return for his contribution. That was hard to accept and easy to condemn. However, as best I could, I closed my mind to his opinion of me. It was not quick or easy, but I had to focus on our common task and on being as polite as possible. Over the course of several weeks, a string of shared work successes buried the interaction and soothed the relationship.

Wounds don't heal while we continue to pick at them through condemnation. They heal when we care for them.