2015 Goals Update

Hidden Bloggers know that I structured this year around the throwback concept of college achievement. Idea: Why not assign grades to the goals? It's amazing to me as a tutor that this thought did not arrive sooner.

Physical Health

Exercise/stretch 5+ days per week (Grade: B+)

My bicycling has been improving, my knee exercises have been on tracks, and I've dabbled back in upper body workouts. I'm planning to use this summer to invest more in exercise.

Body fat 14% (Grade: A)

Check.

Healthy knee (Grade: B-)

No magic turning point yet, but the knee exercises have helped and it has been months since I had any upper-tier pain, probably due to avoidance.

Fruits/vegetables 5+ days per week (Grade: A)

Check.

Increased use of sunscreen and other skin care products (Grade: D)

I've probably applied it around ten days this month.

Financial Health

Expenses below 2014 levels ($31,000) (Grade: A)

Through five months, only $5,000. This goal is fantastically ahead of target. My income for the same period is $16,000!

Improved tutoring records (Grade: F)

On the other hand, this is still a nonstarter. I'll plan to use some summer downtime to go back and upgrade these records.

Community Engagement

Volunteer for a new organization (Grade: F)

No real progress to report here.

Develop and execute a marketing plan for tutoring (Grade: B)

I had a highly successful final exam review session by video conference for three students and am exploring how to enable two-way tutoring. Once I master this there will be vast potential for expansion geographically. Last month I anticipated reaching 350 hours for the semester, and I ended up with over 400! Incredibly blessed.

Personal Character And Leadership

Blog thanks weekly (Grade: C)

So-so on this one. 

Make 10 new acquaintances, including a mentoring relationship (Grade: A)

I'll be getting involved with the Leadership McLean County Alumni Committee, some new faces are coming onto the LMC Steering Committee, and I've volunteered to design a new training program for it. Tiffany Anderson and Brent Kelly raises to six the number for the year. On the 

Lead condominium association projects, such as new driveway (completed January) (Grade: A)

Arrive early/discipline (Grade: C-)

I've mostly arrived on time... as for early, not too often.

Update Wardrobe (Grade: A)
I've been busy with this one. I purged about three dozen clothing items, including almost everything with a date on it. New dress shoes and exercise shoes. New dress shirts and T-shirts. Style is steadily making its way into my strut.

Summary

Looks like my GPA is 2.68 right now. Summer school!

Exercise: Questions Only

Have a conversation with a friend using only questions; in other words, you must answer a question with a question. This is a terrific way to hone your conversation skills.

On another day, whenever you are asked a question, answer it with a question. If you blow it, don't worry; no one will know.

Exercise: The Hunt For Common Ground

For one morning, practice finding common ground with strangers or people you hardly know. Try to find it in less than sixty seconds. Throughout the afternoon, do it in less than thirty seconds.

Ask questions that send a person strainght into his or her imagination. These don't have to be odd or unusual. They simply can't be closed-ended, like "Have you been here before?" Rather ask "What do you think about this convention space?" We call them trance questions because for a split second people glaze over as they go looking for an answer. A funny thing happens to many folks when they go into their imagination at your request: There's a kind of intimacy that happens. It's as though they think you can see, hear, feel, taste and smell the same things they can inside their mind. Ask someone about the last really funny movie they saw and watch their expression and demeanor change.

Actively listen and observe how others find common ground. Collect your own supply of questions. You can't use the same questions for everyone, because we all have differing sensibilities, but you'd be surprised at how many people you can reach with no more than three or four good questions.

Networking Introductions

1. Use the 3-second rule. Deep breath, count to three, and adopt a great attitude - curious, enthusiastic, calm, etc. When you see someone you want to talk to, say 1, 2, 3 and walk over without hesitating. Don't give your brain time to take over and come up with excuses. Seize the moment and approach calmly.

2. Say something. A casual statement about the city or weather or general item. Then an open question beginning with who, what, where, when or how... selecting a topic that directs attention away from the two of you. "Do you know anything about this company?" Use a prop if needed.

3. Build trust quickly. Link yourself to the event by talking about your work, school or community involvement - something local and reliable. You might say "My office is in Montreal, and I come here almost every year."

4. Hunt for common ground. Be on the lookout for opportunities to say "Me, too" or "What a coincidence" or "Funny you should say that." Of course, be honest and sincere.

5. Evaluate. After 20 seconds you should know if a person is interested in talking. If it's not going well, politely exit the conversation and don't be discouraged. Be fearless and calm, and detach yourself from the outcome.

6. Synchronize. If you feel a connection, escalate the intensity by subtly mirroring the person's overall body position and voice (tone, speed, volume).

7. Engage. If it's been 2 minutes, take the encounter where you want, or ask for a phone number or e-mail address. Or indirectly, pick up on something you've been talking about and offer to send a link or some info if they will share an e-mail address (or LinkedIn). If your request is rejected, then say politely, "It was nice chatting with you," and go about your business with your confidence intact.

5 Part Greeting

No matter how many times you've met, this approach to greeting will help: Open, Eye, Smile, Speak, Synch

1. Open. Open your attitude and body. You must already have adopted a useful attitude. Make sure nothing is covering your chest - hands, arms, clipboards. Make sure your hands are visible, a counter to the unconscious fight-or-flight response to hidden things.

2. Eye. Be the first to make eye contact. Immediately make a mental note of the color of the person's eyes.

3. Smile. Be the first to smile. It radiates confidence, honesty, and enthusiasm.

4. Speak. Whether Hey, Hi, or Hello, greet the person with a pleasant tone. If meeting for the first time, get your name in first: "Hello, I'm Joe" - take the lead. Don't let the handshake distract you.

5. Synch. Immediately synchronize with the person's body language and voice characteristics.

Approachability/Authority Scale

Being authoritative or approachable are the North/South Poles of first impressions. What people see first is your attitude. What they see immediately after that is how you put yourself together, your style. Together, these are your unspoken credentials.

Think of a sliding scale of work attire between blue jeans (the pants of the people) to expensive, custom-made suits (the togs of the toffs) at the other.

In my tutoring business I tend to go for approachability when I meet with students. Hooded sweatshirts, sweatpants, gym shoes are the norm. However, the sweatshirt bears my professionally designed logo, the hair and nails neatly trimmed. Then I accessorize with a professional-grade computer bag over my shoulder and a firm handshake when we first meet.

As they say, Dress so you feel at the top of your game, in a way that makes you feel you can conquer the world.

The Pub Approach To Business Introductions

This approach has three parts, as part of delivering a sort of 30-second commercial.

1. You know how... e.g. "You know how so many students struggle with math?"

2. Well we/I... "Well I help students build comfort and confidence..."

3. So they can... "So that they can raise their grade."

Opie Explains His Fortune

"We view the world differently, but we arrive at the same conclusions. Our lives are so different. That's one of the interesting things about the partnership. It's built upon this shared sense of what we want to accomplish together, and what we have in common." - Ron Howard, about his partnership with Brian Grazer

One's a laid-back former child star who roams about in jeans and a ball cap, the other is nattily dressed in suits and trendy hairstyles. Together they've produced blockbuster results in the entertainment industry, sharing the profits 50/50. It gives hope and proves another example of how misleading the cover of a book can be... the contents inside may be the key to your happiness.

Marital Advice From The Geek Squad

"We both come from places where the husband and wife were working things out all the time and there was that mutual respect, and that mutual view of, I want to make sure that I'm doing the best, I'm on my path - but that my partner is also on my path. It's no fun if one is advancing and the other is stale, and I think if you always have that as the guiding principle, it's this unbelievable respect." - Bill Gates

Avoiding The Screws With A Friend You Can Use

"You've got to have somebody - one person who you can really open up with, and be weak with, and be afraid with, and be out of control with, or screwed with. It helps to go through that together. Because you're the leader, and any weakness that comes from you, not to have that one other person to talk that stuff through with is very tough." - Bill Gates

Meditation is great, but God made us such that sometimes we just have to literally get outside ourselves - find a partner or two - to find the relief and bright perspective that we'd lack alone. We're social beings. Teamwork nourishes life in a way that even food and water can't.

Seek And Find Knowledge - And Victory

"I've never done anything solo except take tests. But with the exception of that, I would always seek someone out." - Bill Gates

If someone as tech-savvy and brilliant as Bill relies on others to succeed, how much more should we? As they say, you learn nothing by speaking, and everything by listening. Knowledge leads to productivity and winning.

Integrity Or Bust

"You're looking for three things, generally, in a person. Intelligence, energy, and integrity. And if they don't have the last one, don't even bother with the first two." - Warren Buffett

What is integrity? I like the definition "doing what you say you will do." It's truthfulness between words and actions. There could be other elements I suppose, like being virtuous in values. But at its heart, integrity nurtures trust, which exponentially increases success as a team or as an individual.

Bulls Announce Move In New Direction

The team released a statement Thursday and it wasn't simply to say they wish the man who coached the Bulls for five seasons well. A portion of the comments from Chicago Bulls Chairman Jerry Reinsdorf:

“The Chicago Bulls have a history of achieving great success on and off the court. ...Teams that consistently perform at the highest levels are able to come together and be unified across the organization-staff, players, coaches, management and ownership. When everyone is on the same page, trust develops and teams can grow and succeed together. Unfortunately, there has been a departure from this culture. To ensure that the Chicago Bulls can continue to grow and succeed, we have decided that a change in the head coaching position is required."

The Bulls reached the postseason during each of Thibodeau's five seasons, including a first round loss to the Washington Wizards in 2014. Chicago fell to the Cleveland Cavaliers in six games during the Eastern Conference semifinals earlier this month, losing the finale 94-73 on its homecourt. Thibodeau, a noted defensive coach who worked his star players hard in practice and throughout the season, finished with an overall regular season record of 255-139.

"When Tom was hired in 2010, he was right for our team and system at that time, and over the last five years we have had some success with Tom as our head coach,” said Chicago Bulls General Manager Gar Forman. “But as we looked ahead and evaluated how we as a team and an organization could continue to grow and improve, we believed a change in approach was needed."

Iowa State head coach Fred Hoiberg is the rumored favorite to take over. The next coach won't lack for talent with Derrick Rose, Joakim Noah, Pau Gasol, Taj Gibson and Nikola Mioritc under contract. Restricted free agent Jimmy Butler, named the NBA's Most Improved Player this season, is expected to be retained.

Thibodeau will be hot commodity, but he could choose to sit out a season. His contract with the Bulls called for him to receive $9 million over the next two seasons.

7 Repairs That Will Increase The Value Of Your Home

While purchasing a house may mostly be about having a place to call “home,” it can also be seen as a lifetime investment. Making a few repairs—and even some cost-effective renovations—can not only skyrocket your home’s value, but can make it a more enjoyable place to live. We tapped into our network of Pros to uncover seven of the most valuable repairs you can make for the long term, whether or not you plan to sell in the future.

1. Fix Up the Exterior

As the saying goes, you don’t get a second chance to make a first impression, whether it’s with your new neighbor or a future buyer. Repairing any broken doors, damaged screens, or cracks in your front walk can really make a difference. You might want to consider having your siding pressure-washed, your trim repainted, or your landscaping spruced up.

(Credit: EpicStockMedia/Shutterstock)

2. Repair the Roof

Having a roof over your head is a moot point if that roof is in need of repair. A roofing contractor can make quick work of damaged or missing shingles, clogged gutters and detached flashing. While you’re at it, schedule a chimney cleaning—when’s the last time you had your flue inspected and swept? (Hint: You ought to have this done once a year.)

(Credit: Ruta Saulyte-Laurinaviciene/Shutterstock)

3. Address Plumbing Issues

If the roof doesn’t leak, neither should the plumbing. Hire a plumber to fix those slow drains, dripping faucets and poorly functioning water heater. Keep in mind that you may benefit most from installing a completely new water heater, especially if yours is 10 to 15 years old or more.

(Credit: Chalermchai Chamnanyon/Shutterstock)

4. Improve Interior Walls

If you’re looking to sell your home, you want a potential buyer to be able to visualize living in your home. And while you might love your unique color scheme (we don’t judge), you may want to consider painting your walls a more neutral palette. Ask your painter to patch any holes and sand down the walls while they’re at it to get the best effect.

(Credit: Photographee.eu/Shutterstock)

5. Replace the Flooring

Do you have scratched or buckling hardwood floors, outdated vinyl tiles from the 1970s, or carpet so dirty you can’t remember the original color? One of the fastest and easiest ways to reinvigorate your home is to replace the flooring. With so many options today—stain-resistant carpet, wood-look vinyl flooring,  eco-friendly bamboo or cork—you’re sure to find a floor that you and future owners will love.

(Credit: photobank.ch/Shutterstock)

6. Renovate the Kitchen

You've probably heard it before: The kitchen sells the home. This adage is absolutely true, so if you’re looking for a larger renovation, start with the kitchen. New appliances, refaced cabinetry and stone countertops are a few of the most popular kitchen modifications that will help increase the value of your home.

(Credit: Photographee.eu/Shutterstock)

7. Update the Bathrooms

If your bathrooms look like they belong in the 1980s, it’s time for an update. You can go as low- or high-budget as you like, so talk to your contractor about where to spend your renovation budget to get the biggest impact. New fixtures and updated tile could be all it takes to bring your bathroom into the 21st century.

Memories: 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee

It's been two years since Brett Cottone, Tony Smith and a devoted staff delivered us through the 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee.

How could I forget:

Kallie Bundy's debut as the adorable Olive Ostrovsky?

Joel Shoemaker's boyish portrayal of Chip Tolentino?

Kelly Slater's lisping innocence as Logainne Schwartzandgrubenierre?

Brian Artman's gracefully cocky Willam Barfee?

Austin Travis' clumsy and cuddly Leaf Coneybear?

Chris Stanford's intimidatingly sexy Mitch Mahoney?

Megan Masterman's unmatchable performance as ubertalented Marcy Park?

Aimee Kerber beautifully partner-in-criming it with me the whole way through?

Douglas Panch was my favorite role that I've played. We were off book so early that the last month before opening night was practically a parade. The crowds roared, the cast charmed, it's a show unlike any other with its improv and wit. Remembering it fondly this Memorial Day!

Grace To Current Cubs: Remember 1989

PHOENIX — It’s probably too early to start calling this start to the Cubs’ season a foundation for sustained success — much less to start measuring its sustainability.

But with most in the clubhouse touting this team as a playoff contender, a lost weekend in the desert is at least a reminder of the size of the task.

This first relevant season in years headed into Memorial Day off a break-even road trip that ended with a 4-3 loss to the pedestrian Arizona Diamondbacks.

They hit nine home runs on the trip, committed eight errors, struck out 61 times and blew two saves in six games.

They also got a complete game from second-year starter Kyle Hendricks on Thursday, six RBI from Anthony Rizzo on Saturday and four multihit games from rookie Jorge Soler.

So who are these guys as they reach the traditional Memorial Day milepost — with the red-hot Washington Nationals and defending American League champion Kansas City Royals coming this week to Wrigley Field?

Mark Grace seems to think they look familiar.

A burgeoning homegrown core, a few key veteran pitchers and a couple of established middle-of-the-order hitters?

“When we won in ’89, won the old National League East, we were young,” said Grace, the former Cubs All-Star first baseman now working as the Diamondbacks’ assistant hitting coach. “Ryne [Sandberg] and Andre [Dawson] were still in their prime. There were a lot of young guys.”

Rick Sutcliffe and Greg Maddux were in the rotation. Jerome Walton and Dwight Smith debuted early that season and finished 1-2 in Rookie of the Year balloting. Grace was in his second year in the majors, All-Star shortstop Shawon Dunston in his fifth. Joe Girardi debuted that year.

Talk about a foundation for sustained success.

“When we won the division, a lot of us thought, man, this could happen much more often,” Grace said. “And we were very wrong. It didn’t.

“It’s hard. Winning is hard.”

That’s not to say this Cubs team has any reason to think it will eventually go the direction of that one.

For one thing, it’s hard to imagine this team’s equivalent of Maddux being allowed to walk as a free agent if he wants to stay.

“Things change,” said Cubs bench coach Dave Martinez, the ex-Cub who broke in with that same group in the ’80s before being traded the year before the division title. “And other teams have the same feeling. And it’s hard to do.”

Martinez and manager Joe Maddon talk a lot about “staying in the moment” and “being present,” which, among other things, is meant to keep a team from getting too heady about things such as winning streaks, much less streaks of championship seasons.

Beyond that, “You’ve got to be very fortunate, and you also have to be very talented and very healthy,” Grace said. “And it looks to me like the Cubs have been drafting well and doing really well in the international market.”

The Cubs’ top three prospects — Kris Bryant, Addison Russell and Soler — are in the every-day lineup, with Bryant and Russell having debuted less than a month ago. And the No. 4 prospect, Kyle Schwarber, could be ready to help the club as soon as some point this season, Maddon said before the game Sunday.

“Obviously, they’ve got Bryant, and I’m a huge fan of Rizzo,” Grace said. “Those guys are solidifying the middle of the order.

“When your middle of the order, the heart and soul of your order, is young and talented like that, the future’s bright.”

The History Of Memorial Day

Memorial Day Weekend usually conjures up images of backyard parties, beaches and beer.

But Memorial Day is more than just a three-day weekend marking the unofficial start of summer. It's actually been an official national holiday for over 40 years aimed at remembering those who served in the armed forces.

Here is a brief look at the history behind the holiday and how people are expressing the true meaning of Memorial Day through photos on social media.

A few years after the end of the Civil War, May 30 was established as "Decoration Day" -- a day to decorate veterans' graves with flowers. May 30 may have been the selected day because flowers would be in bloom throughout the country, according to the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs website.

In 1971, Memorial Day was officially declared a national holiday and placed on the last Monday in May, the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs website says.

In December 2000, the president signed into law The National Moment of Remembrance Act.

"The National Moment of Remembrance encourages all Americans to pause wherever they are at 3 p.m. local time on Memorial Day for a minute of silence to remember and honor those who have died in service to the nation," the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs website says.

Looking Smart By Prepping Smart

"Neither Warren nor I is smart enough to make the decisions with no time to think. We make actual decisions very rapidly, but that's because we've spent so much time preparing ourselves by quietly sitting and reading and thinking." - Charlie Munger

I felt as a corporate employee that it was easy to confuse experience with intelligence. People who read or work usually seem much more intelligent than someone who might be bright but not as ambitious. Enthusiasm makes the difference.

To Have Good, Be Good

"If you want to get a good partner, the way to do it is to be a good partner." - Charlie Munger

Goodness is attracted to goodness, and badness to badness. Partnership is a wonderful and painful journey that's best traveled with someone who aligns with your personal virtues.

Good Time With Charlie

"It's a different kind of fun, a fun that comes from being able to share success - and, just as important, failure - with someone else. You've got to enjoy it. It's crazy. I would have had a lot of fun over the years, but not nearly as much fun without Charlie." - Warren Buffett

Charlie Munger is the lawyer and long-time friend of Buffett's, known for being the "no" man in the relationship, challenging ideas but supporting them wholeheartedly in the end.

Most any adventure is more fun with two than alone. Business or life, with its ups and downs, meshes well with someone to share the highs and lows.

Tragedy Denied

"In this world there are only two tragedies. One is not getting what you want, and the other is getting it." - Oscar Wilde

The Importance Of Partnership

"I did it alone, and it wasn't fun. In New York though, as long as I had somebody to talk about what just transpired, I didn't care what anyone else thought, because I knew we knew what we were doing." - Joe Torre

In It For The Benefits

"There have been plenty of times through the years when we said to each other's face, you know, questioning whether I want to keep in this partnership, and I've let myself wonder about it for a week or two, and then it's come to me that it's worth it, because I'll put up with whatever that stupid whatever-it-is-you-do in order to reap the benefits." - Mary Sue Milline

The Moment Your Purpose Strikes

"At that moment, I just said, That's what I want to do. I want to be a chef, and hold a knife like that, and cook that fast, and be that proficient." - Mary Sue Milliken

Two Halves Of One Leader

"It's a really great model - a great story for how a partnership can work. Though our philosophies were similar, our skill sets were different." - Arthur Blank

Rally Thinking

"As long as you think and act if you are coming from behind, you have a shot at staying ahead." - Eisner

Equal Partnership

"I would make three canvases, all of a man riding a horse. The first would be a tiny man atop a giant horse, the second would be a giant man atop a tiny horse, and the third would be a man and horse of equal sizes. In the first scenario, the horse would be too strong and uncontrollable for the man. The second would equally unsuccessful, for the horse could not move under the weight of the man. But the third match would be perfect, with each moving successfully in concert. The man represents intellect, the horse represents emotion. Both need to be equally balanced for any leader to succeed." - Eisner

Math Marathon Day

Today will be a record for most hours spent tutoring high school students!

A two-hour shift from 10-12, then a 7-hour shift from 2-9.

What better way to spend my birthday than doing what God put me on earth to do?

Thanks For The Birthday

Who would've dreamed? Really, who would've dreamed?

Back when I was a kid spending my summers dawdling around MicroLeague Baseball on the computer and playing Whiffle Ball with Jack in the backyard, I'd hardly have been able to say with any certainty that I'd be husband material. Yet here I am, seventeen years married to a woman who's caring and smart and attractive and endlessly hard working.

It would've been tricky to guess that somewhere in my mid-teens I'd devote myself to school in a way that would eventually lead to a great career and early retirement.

I could've anticipated that I'd end up a teacher. Jack's quick to point out how I tutored him in reading at a young age, and he turned out to be a big-time reader and writer. Imagine if I'd tutored him in math?

Mom might never have predicted that I'd end up in music and theater, as her two jock sons spent day after day circling the bases, shooting jumpers or doing the same video-game style.

Would my parents have thought that the kid who was mostly terrifyingly shy of adults would end up graduating from a leadership class, and then coming back to lead that class?

Or that I'd own a cat? As it so happens, with as much affection and playfulness and sweetness that someone could hope for?

God, Mom and Dad have given me a treasure of a life, naturally rich in resources and health. I'm blessed every day, thankful nearly as often.

Happy birthday indeed!

Chicago Bulls: A Study In Leadership

I've read columnists who believe that leadership in basketball, specifically leadership from a head coach, is not very important. At the time I found it hard to believe that. Any team of people, sporting or otherwise, needs at a minimum to have a leader who is smart enough to stay out of the way of the talent. More than that, it almost always needs a leader who exerts a positive influence on the players, using any variety of personal styles - extroverted or introverted, creative or traditional.

I think the best leadership comes from more than just the coach. In the corporate world it's called delegation, and less exactly it's simply the act of people supporting the official leader by providing influence in their own way, through actions or words or both. Good leadership can elevate substandard talent, and poor leadership can weigh it down.

This year's Chicago Bulls seem to be a prime example of the latter.

This isn't a rant about Tom Thibodeau, although reports consistently described his my-way-or-the-highway, one-size-fits-all, grind-it-out mentality which had the cumulative effect in each of five years of a sprinter entering a marathon - impressive performance for much of the race with nothing left to give at the end when it mattered most.

There is Derrick Rose, the star whose talent has been pocked by injuries (which anyone can have), then a deliberately slow rehab and an on-court feud with his teammate and an almost pouty lack of hustle in a playoff game (which leaders cannot do). Meanwhile, Jimmy Butler canceled his cable subscription so that he could focus entirely on his game last summer, working tirelessly and becoming the NBA's Most Improved Player this year.

Thus a team with fantastic talent (including the Most Improved Player and a member of the All-Rookie team), and height, and a tactically brilliant defensive coach fails to top a playoff team whose 2nd best player is gone and whose 3rd best player is ailing.

Coaches need to be adaptable and players need to be tough. I've been on teams where the calming presence of one member was enough to remind me to keep my cool when times got tough. In the absence of that emotional anchor, things can break down easily. The whole personality of a team is shaped by the strength or weakness of character by the leaders. People do what people see. In this case, people underachieved, and lost.

There is much to be learned about leadership through this year's Bulls.

My First Tutoring Broadcast

As a developmental phase of the tutoring business I've been exploring ways to broadcast tutoring over the internet.

Thanks to Kirt McReynolds' recommendation I learned of zoom.com. For $10 a month I set up an account that allowed me unlimited minutes in staging a group video conference.

I bought a modest HD camera on a stand, pointed it over my shoulder at a small whiteboard, collected student e-mail addresses, and set a two-hour date for this afternoon.

Zoom.com allows the same video and chat capabilities as Skype, and as far as I could tell did so without some of the interruptive issues. As meeting organizer it gave me capability to mute any audio that was disruptive background noise.

The students could see my writing clearly, the audio was crisp, and their questions perfectly filled the time allotted. Plus there was a recording feature that let me capture it for playback benefits. This will also enable me to create my own videos if I'd like!

I can now say with great confidence that I can do this type of one-way tutoring for anyone in the country. If I can solve it into two-way tutoring, then it gives me flexibility beyond the library's hours, and in fact beyond the library itself. And if I can figure out how to be paid online, then the only thing that would separate me from going national is marketing.

Exciting times!

Leading With The Heart

A small but simple and useful habit: Point your heart at the person you're with!

Granted, it's not the most natural posture for guys, who studies have shown prefer side-by-side communication (why do you think we are so fond of fishing and driving, for example)? But it expresses an openness and care that is outwardly inviting to those we're with.

While we're at it, why not lead with the heart in other ways too? Share love and compassion through your words. Reflect on it in your thoughts. It's a much lighter way to live than hunkered-down, closed off.

God made our heart the center of life. Bring it forward!

How To Radiate Energy

1. What is your attitude? It's the first thing people notice and it immediately rubs off on those around you. Why are you optimistic about this situation? Remind yourself often.

2. What is your posture? Upright or stooped? Shoulders back or slumped? Relaxed or rigid? Suit the situation.

3. What's your facial expression? It's hard to go wrong with a smile most of the time. Do you practice your smile? Is it crooked or straight? Friendly or cocky? Enthusiastic or sarcastic?

4. How much eye contact do you make? In most situations, eye contact reflects your interest. Plus, eyes can smile almost as well as the mouth can!

Find Out What You're Getting, Then Get What You Want

"Find out what you're getting. Pay attention to all the feedback you get and learn from it. Then change what you do until you get what you want." - Nicholas Boothman

Some of the kindest feedback I've gotten this year came at the tail end of Dirty Rotten Scoundrels, when a cast member wrote a note that said "You are a great example of a Christian man." To be regarded in that way is about the highest honor I can think of, and one that'd make Mom & Dad happy too.

Embracing constructive feedback is not the most natural part of who I am, but I did embrace it as best I could through the Dirty Rotten Scoundrels experience. From the moment I was cast in a lesser role I believed that God was teaching me humility, and the growth in my ability to play drunk on stage and to dance more lightly on my feet was a satisfying exercise in seeking feedback from the experts.

Know What You Want

"Know what you want. Define what you want in positive terms, in the present tense." - Nicholas Boothman

This bit of "mission statement" advice got me to thinking about purpose. How about these?

For the business: "We inspire happiness through education."

For myself: "I inspire happiness through optimism."

Someone once kindly described me as the type of person who brings energy into a room. I'm not only thankful for that, but also for the many people in my life who provide the same in return.

Thanks For The Haircut

I walked into Custom Cuts as a recent college graduate who'd just moved into his first apartment. As a man in the process of asking his parents to help with a down payment for a condominium, I was attracted by the State Farm employee discount and the "every 7th cut is free" policy.

Twenty years later, the discount and policy are long gone (as is the State Farm job). The name of the place has changed (to LookAfter). Yet here I am, perhaps their longest-tenured customer. Sure, the place is no longer on my way home from work. But I stay because those employees are like family to each other, and to me. The work environment is sunny, and several have been there for ten years or more. When I enter or leave I'm greeted by multiple employees, and they all seem to remember what I'm doing in my life and ask about it.

All things are temporary, especially when it's essentially an hourly paid job. While it lasts, I'm going to be extremely grateful for this unusually bright neighborhood.

Thanks For The iPhone

I finally made the jump into this decade by buying my first iPhone.

I'm going to charge it up as a work expense. I was tipped over the line by some inefficiencies from my basic phone... texts getting lost or mangled, and my move toward doing on-line and other technological-styled delivery systems for tutoring. In these situations it's mighty helpful to be able to explain how to download an app, or to take photos of a document to share with a student.

Or to take my first selfie.

Thanks For The Sleep

The last few nights I have found myself naturally overcome with sleepiness around midnight. I've made it up to bed timely, and have enjoyed mostly undisturbed sleep from which I've awoken naturally around 8am. When that happens, it's much more likely for me to wake up with enthusiasm and energy - enough to power a string of blog posts!

Thanks For The Rain

Nearly every spring, and all throughout the year, I'm thankful for rain. "When it's raining, it's not snowing" has long been one of my mantras. Even though I prefer sunny days over any other, it may be something about the element of cleansing and renewal that nudges my heart fondly toward it. The grass has transformed from wispy to full, to its most vibrant green, and with a dewiness that Cupcake loves to sip. Water is life for us all; it is so scarce in so many places on Earth, yet so abundant here. It's a symbol of warmth worth celebrating.

Thanks For The Career

During a weekly shopping trip to Sam's Club I noticed a cashier from a distance who looked worn-out. Since I was small enough to fit into a crib I've had some natural empathy for people who look sad. What were her personal circumstances? Is it her second or third job? Is she under threat of being fired, or just not happy with her work? Does the job cause physical pain to arthritic knees or hands?

Without knowing the first thing about her, I am reminded that if bad things happen to good people, there is at least the upside of the perspective that it brings. In that moment it refreshed my gratitude for the long and successful career that God blessed me with at State Farm, as well as for that of the tutoring business. In each case the results have been surprising, which adds to the joy. I'll continue to celebrate it for as long as it lasts.

Thanks For The Audition

My friendly theater agent Wendi Fleming introduced me to an audition for the Bloomington Center for the Performing Arts' summer production of Hairspray! Six shows are planned for the last weekend in July and first weekend in August. The Illinois muggy heat would be quite the experience if I end up as Corny Collins dancing around in a suit, and the possibility of rain adds another unusual flair to the experience. My audition is Tuesday June 2 at 7:30pm. Despite its status as my first and possibly dearest show, I'm especially looking forward to the vehicle it can be toward my annual goal of making new acquaintances. Often times the people I meet in new adventures can lead to other people and even more adventures.

Thanks For The Band

As regular readers of Hidden Blog know, it has been a tremendous blessing for me to be part of the Epiphany Catholic Church's band for most of the last three years. The character of Sean and Jennifer Stevens, Father Eric, and my other bandmates and their families have been a model of love, harmony and support. I've blogged often about the exciting journey of dedicated renewal that the church is riding, and a new direction for the band that has arisen from it has resulted in a new one for me as well. Whether God's plan is for me to continue in a musical ministry or not remains to be seen, but I have learned that as long as I am receptive to the gentle tug against my roots, I will be planted in my most fruitful soil.

Blooper-Reel Play Gives Cubs 5th Straight Win

CHICAGO -- Matt Szczur merely needed a fly to win the game. He just didn't think -- and neither did anyone else at Wrigley Field -- that the ball he hit would do the trick.

That is, until Pittsburgh right fielder Gregory Polanco took a most startling trip.

Polanco slipped and fell while trying to catch an easy fly, and the ball dropped for an RBI single in the 12th inning that sent the Chicago Cubs over the Pirates 11-10 Friday.

"That's not how we drew it up," a stunned Szczur said. "That's for sure."

The Cubs won their fifth straight game in unlikely fashion, and matched their longest string since last June.

Chicago loaded the bases with one out in the 12th against Radhames Liz (0-1) and the Pirates went to a five-man infield. Szczur lifted a routine fly to shallow right, surely not deep enough to score the winning run.

Polanco came running in with plenty of time to make the grab, then stumbled to the ground. He reached up with his bare left hand trying to make a play, but had no chance.

Sprawled in the grass, his sunglasses flying off his head, Polanco never came close to touching the ball as Starlin Castro ran home.

"He didn't have to go far to get the ball and then he made a little move to his left and crossed his feet," Pirates manager Clint Hurdle said. "That just took him out of the play, took him down to the ground."

Said Szczur: "I couldn't believe it. I just couldn't believe it."

Polanco wasn't at his locker in the immediate aftermath of the loss.

A crazy ending, considering that in the exact same situation in the 10th -- bases loaded, one out -- Polanco caught a longer fly by Szczur and threw out Castro at the plate to end the inning.

Given another try, Szczur didn't hit the ball nearly as well, yet wound up in the middle of a celebration after a most bizarre single.

Castro said he was planning on testing Polanco's arm again, even after being thrown out two innings earlier.

"I've got to do it again," Castro said. "When I saw (Polanco moving toward the ball), `I said, I've got to do it here. It don't matter if you make me out at home plate."

Edwin Jackson (1-1) pitched the 12th for the win.

Rookie Kris Bryant hit his fourth homer and drove in four runs, helping the Cubs take a 10-5 lead into the eighth inning.

The Pirates scored four times in the eighth on a solo homer by Josh Harrison and a three-run shot from Andrew McCutchen.

Ahead 10-9, Cubs reliever Hector Rondon retired the first two batters in the ninth. Harrison followed with a double, moved up on a wild pitch and scored the tying run on Francisco Cervelli's two-out single.

Cervelli hit a three-run double as part of a four-run rally in the sixth that pulled Pittsburgh to 7-5.

Bryant hit his third home run this week. Anthony Rizzo also homered and drove in two runs for Chicago, who improved to 4-1 in extra-inning games this season.

"It really would have been a sin not to have won that game based on how we played," Cubs manager Joe Maddon said.

MR. 800

Maddon celebrated his 800th career win Thursday by taking in a concert featuring Pete Townshend, Eddie Vedder, Joe Walsh, Joan Jett and Rick Nielsen, who performed the music of The Who. "Townshend was unbelievable and Eddie Vedder was fantastic," Maddon said. "I got to meet him for the first time. Joe Walsh? Wow. I wish they'd maybe included a couple more things. No encore, which I was disappointed with, so I talked to Eddie about that afterwards. I could listen to that all night."

Which Skill Best Predicts Success?

We all face obstacles in our lives and careers — and while they can make us better and stronger, they can also put us over the edge.

Turns out, the ability to get over those hurdles and persevere is the strongest sign of our ability to succeed, according to Mark Goulston, a psychiatrist, author, and former FBI hostage-negotiation trainer. 

"Possessing the skill of handling obstacles well demonstrates a high level of self-reliance, good judgment, and resourcefulness," he explains. "The more proactive and resourceful you are, and the better your judgment calls and decision-making are when you're dealing with an obstacle, the greater the trust and confidence others will have in you." And where there's trust, there's success. 

Goulston says savvy hiring managers will use the interview to determine whether you've mastered this skill and possess these traits.

"If you give any indication that you don't handle obstacles well, the employer will assume you're the type of person who will just dump your problems on your boss," he says. And nobody wants to hire that guy.

Goulston, who now works as a business advisor and consultant for executives and employees at big corporations, including GE, IBM, and Goldman Sachs, says he worked with a headhunting firm to come up with the best questions for identify the top candidates for jobs. 

He suggests employers ask these questions, and candidates be ready to answer them (with concrete examples for each):

Give me an example of an obstacle you faced and what you did that involved: 

• not having the skills to do what was expected of you.
• not being able to develop skills you needed and having to attain and use resources outside yourself and your group/department.
• having to attain and use resources outside your company.
• not being clear with what you were being asked by a superior who intimidated you.
• having to gain cooperation from people within your group or from another part of your organization who appeared non-cooperative or kept putting you off.
• dealing with downsizing in your department or group.
• dealing with a reprimand or negative performance review.
• having to hold accountable and confront a difficult person about something they were doing wrong or something they were failing to do.
• dealing with a mistake you've made.
• dealing with the biggest setback in your career.

Police Help Alzheimer's Patient Buy Mother's Day Flowers

Arrieta Good, Bryant Better In Cubs' Win

CHICAGO -- Sorry Jake Arrieta, we've seen you do this act before. Maybe not as much this season but you had a chock-full of these outings in 2014. We'll get back to your eight-inning, three-hit performance in the Chicago Cubs' 6-1 win over the New York Mets on Tuesday night in a moment. First, we have a question.

Is there anything Kris Bryant can't do?

The Cubs rookie had a signature game in nearly single-handily beating the Mets. He did it with his glove, his bat and, yes, once again with his feet.

"I think I'm kind of fast," Bryant said afterward. "It's always fun to get an infield single on a ball you don't normally get an infield single on. I'm trying to be the complete player. I think I've improved a lot defensively. I'm working on that every day. I'm pleased with the all-around game right now and I think I'm going to get better."

He's pretty good right now. For the second time in a week Bryant beat out a routine ground ball for a base hit. And for the second time it arguably made the difference in the game. This time it was a bit more subtle but just as effective. Here was the scenario:

Kris Bryant hit his third home run of the season and was just a double short of a cycle against the Mets. AP Photo/Charles Rex Arbogast

In a scoreless game with two outs and no one on base in the third inning, Bryant hit a routine grounder to third baseman Daniel Murphy. Murphy took his time throwing over to first base, allowing Bryant to beat it out. Starting pitcher Noah Syndergaard walked the next two batters, adding 18 pitches to his total. It came back to bite him as he clearly tired in the sixth inning when the Cubs chased him from the game with four runs, three charged to Syndergaard.

"I didn't make the play," Murphy said. "It cost Noah some pitches, unfortunately. He could have gotten way deeper in the game. I was pretty frustrated about it."

Cubs manager Joe Maddon's take: "He's a baseball player, man.

"He's a guy that plays the whole game and understands the concepts of offense and defense, and offense includes base running. Why is it so difficult to respect 90 feet? I don't understand that, I don't get it. That sub-group out there that doesn't believe in that stuff, I don't understand that."

Bryant believes in it. We've seen that already. The infield hit was just the beginning of his big night.

"Any ground ball I hit I'm going to run as hard as I can," he said.

Two innings later Bryant hit his first triple, hammering the ball to right field and then flying around the bases. This is no normal slugger. He can move.

"That's the swing that I want," he said. "I haven't been able to do that a lot up here. I was pretty pleased with that one."

A walk during the sixth inning rally made it three times on base. The icing on the cake was a mammoth home run out to left field in the eighth inning, his second in as many nights.

"He's got huge power, I can tell you that," Mets manager Terry Collins said. "That was pretty obvious, I thought. That's why I can really scout. He's got a good swing. He's got a real good swing. We've got to go out and locate it, because as this guy grows into himself and starts to know what he's got to do up here, he's going to be a real, real good hitter. You know, he's got some feet, too. Watching him in the field defensively, he's got some range. He's legit."

Collins said all of that before Tuesday's game. What he saw for the first time Cubs fans are starting to get used to. Bryant also flashed his leather on Murphy making a great play and throw to rob him of a hit in the seventh. He did it all.

"We knew it was just a matter of time before he got hot," Arrieta said. "He's extremely polished for his age. He's just a special talent."

OK Jake, we can give you your due now. Arrieta looked every bit as dominant as his abilities suggest he can be. He froze hitters with a devastating curveball while throwing a season-high 116 pitches. His last one nearly buckled the knees of Johnny Monell. Unfortunately, it came just before Bryant's home run so it might get lost in the shuffle. But Bryant's near-cycle won't be forgotten soon.

"I knew I wasn't getting that," Bryant said. "Hopefully one time in my career I'll get that. The triple is the hardest part and I got that."