What Makes A Person Good?

I came across a series of three self-reflective questions today.

What do you do to keep your skills sharp? What behaviors could others emulate? How did you get to be who you are?

1. I stay in physical shape. Weighing myself every day keeps me in check, the scale is definitely a "life coach" for me. I know how about many calories will keep me at my current weight, and how much fat is in my diet. I drink about 8 glasses of water a day. I try to get 7-8 hours of sleep a night. For the most part I avoid sweets and soda. I've never had coffee. I rarely eat red meat, though I do love a good burger.

2. I minimize negative situations. I'd like to say "avoid" there, but I initiate too many of them myself to qualify, though I'm trying hard to cut back. I change the station if the radio/T.V. gets harshly judgmental - no Bill O'Reilly, Rush Limbaugh, most political conversations, plenty of religious ones, lots of sports ones. I choose my friends carefully - do they laugh with people instead of at people, strive to improve, see the bright side, act generously, pay compliments, say thank you, ask about the well-being of others? In a team environment, are they inclusive or do they give orders, open-minded or opinionated, communicative or secretive, empowering or controlling, humble or self-congratulating?

3. As someone once said, I'm a learner. I read about respected leaders to see what values and habits they have. I'm fascinated by the psychology of self-help books - not the overly academic kind, mind you, but the kind that tells stories and gives practical tips. I analyze (probably overanalyze) my mistakes to avoid repeating them. I believe that every person is better than me in some way, and try to pick up their best qualities.

4. I set goals. What gets measured, gets done.

5. I keep my options open, rarely make long-term commitments, and don't equate the things I do with who I am. That gives me the flexibility to do things for as long as I love to do them... and when I change or circumstances change, to move on to something else I love to do, without feeling like a part of me has died. When I love what I'm doing, I'm at my best.

6. Rules of thumb: I don't think about work once I leave work. I keep a mental library of pleasant visions and memories, like upcoming vacation, or maybe a massage, to blot out bad moods when they start to grow. If I still find myself brooding, I do something to distract myself like read a magazine. If nothing's working, it usually means I'm tired... so I completely relax or sleep until I'm ready to go. To relax for bed, I read something light, drink a glass of milk, eat a light snack with carbohydrates, and/or watch comedies on TV. I do not send angry e-mails. I do not argue with people, at least not until I've had a chance to think about what they said quietly on my own for a while. With few exceptions, I believe that everyone's political, religious and personal opinions might be right.