I like control.
Most definitely, to a fault.
The type-A personality has won me a lot of material satisfactions. And cost me in relationships. And in personal stress.
I once was in a band, playing guitar and singing. In time, as expectations changed, I dealt poorly with it. I resisted. I feared the worst. I lost joy.
I'm in a band again, and expectations are changing. I'm not sure how our increased rehearsal time will allow me to continue to say "yes" to all the students who need me, on top of my commitment to theater and condominium board and all the rest.
Uncertainty suits a control-happy person like a cloak of thorns.
That's where God comes in.
I can fret about what might happen, start scheming to head potential conflict off before it occurs.
This time, I'm letting go.
The band has been a blessing, as have all my current involvements. I don't know if my time is drawing to an end or not. If it is, I can release that. If not, I can celebrate it.
Wherever God leads this situation, I'll go. I'll try to make it work on the fly. Knowing that I have wind and wings carrying me along to wherever I'm supposed to be. Like an angel. Who wouldn't want that?
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