Mudslinging Party

On the way home I heard a radio report talking about two candidates for governor "taking shots at each other." Hidden Bloggers know that I believe in the connection between health and attitude. So here's a proposal for a healthier nation.

Let's acknowledge that politicians have faults. And that it's deceptive to hide faults. Voters have a yearning to know, on some level, what the dirty laundry is of each candidate. I think in part that's because we want to see the human side of our leaders (or servants, depending on how you view elected officials), rather than a character. Or because we want to better understand their weaknesses and see how they match up with the issues we each hold most dear.

Let's also remember that the great movies of all time, as a proxy for the American way, hit their low point well before the final scene. In Hoosiers, it was the town hall meeting to vote whether Coach Dale would keep his job. This was ugly. Citizens paraded up to the front and blasted the Coach's performance. Then he got a chance to speak on his own behalf. He defiantly defended his actions for a while before running out of gas. Then a soft-spoken town woman steps in with a vote of confidence. A soft-spoken star player seconds the emotion. In the end a thunderous "yea" vote rocks the house.

Let's schedule a town hall meeting one month prior to the election. This is the one and only sanctioned event in the process for unfettered mud slinging at each and every opponent. A roast without the laughs. No holds barred. Each candidate gets on stage, one at a time, and opponents are allowed a period of time to unearth and hold in the spotlight the very darkest, scariest, most offensive, un-American, selfish, extremist-leaning, unethical, idiotic, soft, inflexible, bumbling, incompetent tales of his or her nature. Up comes the next candidate. Slam city. Next up, an it's another verbal bloodbath. Then round two, where the vilified parade through in order again, allowed to respond in any fashion they please... except that they may not say anything derogatory about any other person. And once the meeting ends, so does the negativity. Thereafter, candidates may speak only favorably about other candidates for the duration of the campaign.

Let's remember that this is a nation of freedom of speech, and that candidates can say whatever they wish after this blessed event as well. But let's also remember that America overcame great odds to survive its infancy, and thrives when we expect our government to represent strength, and not backbiting. Let's vote in those who honor their opponents, honor the system, and in so doing honor the ideal American spirit of optimism that overcame the largest armies of the world to build the life we know today.

I'm sure loopholes abound with an idea like this. But wouldn't it be fun to see it tried?