Monday, August 2, 2010

Local Man Retires From Talk Radio

A 16-year resident of Normal announced his resignation from talk radio Monday afternoon.

His publicist explained that while driving to a soccer game, the man was deterred by overtly and continued sarcastic remarks on behalf of "something or other." The stream of pessimism about the topic, which was either national or local, encouraged a change of station.

The new station, featuring Chicago sports debate, produced a fountain of Cubs-related despair that was both excessively bitter and depressingly accurate.

"The mind feeds upon whatever stirs the emotions. Cutting remarks pass for entertainment the way donuts pass for breakfast - a cheap, quick source of enjoyment that imperceptibly and gradually drags the body down. These different views of productive broadcasting have become irreconcilable in recent weeks, and retirement became the appropriate option."

He moves on to continue his listening career as an FM audience member. Early statistics show 91.5 WCIC to be the leading provider.

"Christian radio, in all its staggering repetition, nonetheless fills empty air and susceptible minds with messages of hope and thankfulness. And there's every reason to expect a positive experience, as long as no mention is made of the Cubs."

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