On Thursday afternoon an insurance employee was mistaken for a U.S. Marine officer when he emerged from a salon with a garish haircut.
The inadvertent makeover resulted from a miscommunication with a new stylist who interpreted the instruction of "clippers around the side, blend in at the top" to be "clippers all around." When the boisterous woman sheared the razor up from his neck and unprecedentedly close to the crown of his head, he reflexively threw an arm up in the air to deflect the maneuver. The follicular assault was halted, and desperate countermeasures were employed by the stylist to reinforce the damaged front line.
The man's covert "Operation Unseen Skulk To The Car" encountered resistance by a passing troop of Boy Scouts who, at the impromptu request of their misjudging scoutmaster, gave the non-marine a hearty sidewalk cheer of thanks for his non-existent service and swarmed about. When pressed for inspirational remarks, the polo-shirt clad declared "I regret that I have but one life to misgive for my country."
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